Happy Thanksgiving!!!
You see the commercials with stores opening at 6, or 5, or even 4am!!! I don't know, but its not my holiday tradition to deprive myself of sleep to endure a maddening crowd to get a $20 DVD player. But if it is your thing, best wishes on your Friday trek to the store.
I'm endeavoring to find a simpler way to handle my Christmas this year, I want to just enjoy it, and I've realized its not the gifts that make the memories, or that I even most look forward to. Its the time spent with people, its the lights, its the songs, its the food, its the mood. So with that, I'll enjoy my Thanksgiving today, and then have a most Merry Christmas season. Thats the plan anyhow.
What to say, I can worry over my life, but compared to many others, I've got it pretty good.
So confusing this world, the haves and have nots, and the great distance between them.
On one side, there are people who can freely buy yachts, aircraft, vacation villas, apartments in Paris and Manhattan, wearing nothing but haute couture
Then there are people who have no clue if they will eat today, wearing nothing but rags, and certainly never even taking a coach class plane ride.
Of course most of us are in between somewhere, of course those of us who have means to a computer have some leg up already.
I guess I have a home that I own, its small, but hey I'm the only occupant, I have more food than I need to eat, I worry about how to eat less and maybe lose weight. I'm typing my blog, and listening to my iPod, and technically I'm at work, (a break I enjoy) I have a car and can travel to about any place I'd like. I'm not going first class, and my wardrobe is mostly sales at the mall.
For all that I have, somehow I got conditioned to still feel inadequate, whether that is a human trait or part of the American consumer culture, dont know. I live in a corner of the world where abundance is in your face, and its easy to see all that you dont have. Easy to feel like a failure, what did I do wrong to not have that!? Why can I only have a small one bedroom, when they can afford a house with a pool, and a nicer car than me, and they are younger than me!
Hmm, but then the poorer folk live here too, struggling to pay the rent, unable to have health insurance, driving a car that might break any moment, but needing to last another year or more, skipping a meal for lack of money.
Guess I'm doing ok, I'm getting by and slowly edging up.
I'm rambling now, so I'll stop there.
I'm watching The Beach on TV, been some years since I've seen it. Makes me want to take an exotic vacation, somewhere really different. I love to travel, just kinda dont prefer going it alone. But I will when I have to.
Places I'd like to see, maybe Hong Kong, Buenos Aires, Rivieras French Italian and Mexican, French Polynesia, ohh and many more places. Just had a really good trip to Hawaii so next vacation is a way off, but nice to start imagining.
Getting cabin fever.
I've been working at home the last couple weeks, and with 12 hours shifts at night, I've been in my little home for days. I do make time to take a walk in the afternoon before the sun sets at 5pm. Its my only contact with daylight now. I know nights into the winter are always the toughest shifts for me, so I'm trying to increase my activity and exposure to light to offset my usual Seasonal Depression.
The biggest plus to working at home is my car has been parked for days and days. I walk to the park, to the store, to the bank, so I dont have to buy extra gas working at home, and with prices going up as they are, thats an extra savings I enjoy.
Had a good earthquake this evening in San Jose, 5.6 I was at work on the 16th floor, and it was a good ride for about 30sec or so, not quite scary but getting close. First good earthquake I've felt in a few years. Of course now I'm wondering if anything broke at home, so have a few more hours to go. I suspect it should be ok, maybe a thing or two fell of a shelf? Just dont need any broken windows or pipes.
Relax.
I spent this day finding escape through television, sleep, exercise, and a glass of wine.
Just a day to unwind, let my mind find diverting things to get lost in, and its worth it. It was a busy day, productive day, and yet relaxing day at the same time.
I think for myself, most things are not so bad when going through the motions, but all the what ifs and what will bees bog me down, and I can get overwhelmed. I think there is some use is diverting the mind with other activities, and particularly if also positive activities, I can overall improve my life.
Will I be better tomorrow, probably not, gotta go back to work, but I've at least thought about a path to make myself happier. Well tomorrow might be better, I'll look toward the sunny side of life.
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